Tragically the old project manager succumbed to years of battling difficult stakeholders and uncooperative resources.

As his soul arrived at the Pearly Gates, St. Peter himself was on hand to greet him.

“Welcome to Heaven,” said St. Peter. “Before you get settled in though, as with everyone, we’d like to give you the opportunity to experience both Heaven and Hell so what we’re going to do is let you have a day in each before you decide where you wish to spend eternity.”

“Fair enough, although I’m sure I want to be in Heaven”, said the project manager.

“But you’ve never been to Hell so how would you possibly know?” And with that the project manager found himself on an express elevator to Hell.

As the doors opened he found himself stepping onto a beach of fine white sand, with deep blue water lapping at his feet and a bar with a gorgeous waiter serving refreshing cocktails.

Just beyond that he could see a luxury hotel and friendly faces welcoming him, many of them people he knew from his life as a project manager. They sat around, reminisced, laughed, swam and then as the bright golden sun disappeared below the horizon they all went into the hotel for an amazing meal.

The PM even met Satan who was also very friendly, and not at all like the evil devil he had been led to believe he was. The evening was fabulous with more drink, jokes and dancing.

Heaven or Hell?

The PM had a wonderful time in Hell but all too quickly his visit came to an end and he was put in the elevator to sample Heaven. When he arrived back in Heaven St. Peter was once again there to greet him.

“OK, so now it’s time to spend 24 hours in Heaven” he said. The PM took his place amongst the clouds. Everyone was sitting around, chatting quietly, playing lutes and harps, and everything was terribly nice. People were pleasant but it was nothing like as much fun as Hell.

In fact, the 24 hours seemed interminable but eventually it all came to an end and St. Peter came see him.

“So,” he said, “you’ve experienced Heaven and Hell – where would you like to spend the rest of eternity?”

“Well, everyone and everything is very pleasant here in Heaven but it’s a lot more lively down below and I think I’m better suited to spending the rest of eternity in Hell.”

St. Peter nodded and escorted him back to the elevator which took him back down to Hell.

But when he arrived it was very different from the day before.

He found himself standing in a hot, dry, putrid smelling wilderness and as for the unspeakable things that were being done to his friends…

Satan approached the project manager and welcomed him to spending eternity in Hell.

“I don’t understand,” said the PM.

“When I came yesterday it was fabulous food and drink, beautiful sun drenched sandy beaches, clear blue seas and people having a good time. Now all I can see is a wasteland with starving people having very unpleasant things done to them.”

The Devil looked at him and smiled, “that’s because yesterday we were recruiting you, but now you’re on the project team.”

The young project manager had started his new project and was being given a briefing from the retiring project manager. At the end of the handover the retiring project manager gave him three numbered envelopes.

“My predecessor gave me these three envelopes and I have found them extremely useful. Should you encounter any difficulties with the project you may also find the advice inside useful.”

Things went along smoothly for a while but then the project started to encounter problems and stakeholders were beginning to get anxious. The project manager remembered the advice he was given by the outgoing PM at the beginning of his project and took the first envelope from his desk drawer.

The message inside read, “Blame your predecessor.”

So at the next project meeting the project manager laid the blame for the project’s problems on the decisions made by the previous project manager. The stakeholders seemed to accept the situation our young PM faced and offered their continuing support.

As the weeks passed the old issues with the stakeholders returned and the project encountered yet more problems. Having benefitted from the earlier advice, the PM decided to open the second envelope.

The message read, “Blame changes in the environment”.

The PM duly pointed out the changes that the business and the economy had gone through since starting the project, replanned the activities and moved the milestones to reflect the new circumstances. The stakeholders were impressed by the proactive stance taken by the PM and for a while the project made good progress.

However, it wasn’t long before the project again hit problems and so the PM decided to get advice from the third envelope.

The message inside said, “Prepare three envelopes.”

The project manager was taking some well-earned time off from a complex and bruising project and was taking his dog for a walk in the park. Suddenly in a puff of purple smoke, a figure appeared. When the smoke had finally cleared the figure said, “I am your Fairy Godmother and because of your ongoing commitment to helping people deliver capabilities and gain business value through project management, I am going to grant you three wishes.”

The PM was taken aback but after a short think said, “I would like for my dog who has had a fairly hard life to win the Greyhound Derby.”

“What is his name?”

“Lucky” said the PM.

The Fairy Godmother looked Lucky up and down and said, “I did say I would grant you three wishes, not three miracles, so let me have your next wish.”

The PM started to tell his Fairy Godmother about the difficulties he was having with his project and how in keeping with the Association for Project Management’s Strategy 2020 vision he believed in A world in which all projects succeed (APM).

“For my second wish I would like my project to come in on time, on budget and meet the quality requirements of my stakeholders.”

The Fairy Godmother paused for a few seconds and said, “Let’s take another look at that dog.”